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03 February 2005 @ 06:38 pm
There's nothing like working on my resumé to make me feel like garbage  
Got a lead from a friend in Aikido for a job (Beta Programs Coordinator) at Macromedia. So I'm fixing up my resume to conform to their specifications. I am not going to get this job (part of their specifications is that applicants must have at least one degree. So I'm out.)

My resume is shitty. Unfortunately, it's not how I wrote it that makes it shit (that's fixable), it's the facts that have to go into it. I have no degree and my jobs have all been short-term (3 years at most), undemanding peon positions and manual labor, showing a distinct reduction in responsibilities and need for thought as the years go by.

I wanted to use a "functional resume"—basically, bluffing my way through by listing stuff I've done or learned in my free time as "relevant experience" and glossing over the crappiness of my actual education and work experience—but they only accept traditionally formatted resumés. So I'm stuck.

I want a do-over on my life.
 
 
Current Mood: crappycrappy
Current Music: quiet sobs coming from yours truly
 
 
 
Animalanimal_co on February 4th, 2005 03:44 am (UTC)
Have you looked into smaller companies? Small organizations are great places to pick up experience, and they're usually more flexible in hiring than big outfits. And it's never too late to get your degree.
gwalla: halloweengwalla on February 4th, 2005 04:10 am (UTC)
I've been looking everywhere. But I don't have the qualifications for a job I'd like, and I refuse to go back to working in a warehouse, a task to which I am completely unsuited.

I could probably scrape up enough cash in returning-student scholarships & such to go back to school. The only problem: my crushing debt. I'd be back at school, in a wheelchair because the credit card company's goons would've broken my kneecaps (more realistically, I'd be back at school with a seriously bad credit history).
Animalanimal_co on February 4th, 2005 04:17 am (UTC)
Look at it as a long-term investment. Within five years, the increase in your earning potential will probably make up the difference.
maggie*marmalade: seriousmaggiemarmalade on February 4th, 2005 05:28 am (UTC)
Gwalla,

Take out loans, got to community college, transfer to one of the UCs.

Seriously, just take out loans. You gotta.
maggie*marmalade: seriousmaggiemarmalade on February 4th, 2005 05:29 am (UTC)
... take out loans as long as you can.

At least try.
The All-Purpose Guruallpurposeguru on February 4th, 2005 09:14 am (UTC)
When I graduated at Chico I had every credit card maxed to the absolute limit. I had no choice, it was the only way I could pay for everything-- I couldn't work very much my last year because I had too much to do. I knew I would be paying everything off for a while after I got out, so it was a means to an end.

Then, my hire-on bonus eradicated the entire thing.

It's worth it.

Auroraaurora77 on February 4th, 2005 06:32 pm (UTC)
They may SAY they want all these qualifications, but that doesn't necessarily mean they will require them. I only have an AS in comp sci and I have a job that would often require a 4-year degree and certification is preferred, not to mention better knowledge of SQL, CSS, Javascript, web services, ITIL, and so on and so forth.

Yet I managed to get into where I am through the back door. I played around with the application and learned the basics on my own. I got my company to send me to a little basic training. Then, after some networking, I discovered that I knew someone who knew someone who knew someone. And that's what got me this job at twice the pay of the last one. I didn't go to college to do programming/development. I just found something I liked and started doing it. I decided to continue doing it. I networked. I talked to people. I did that for a few months, and here I am.

You're a smart guy. You are a logical thinker. I think you can do it. I don't know anybody who worked or works for Macromedia, but if you're looking for connections in Cali, I can try to hook you up with some people who know people. Just tell me what in particular you're looking for.

I also recommend highlighting any experience you may have online. If you've done volunteer work that's relevant, mention it. You don't have to go into detail as to what the site is, but you can mention that you volunteered your time to write scripts or an application or to manage web content or whatever you did.

If you find a company you really like, one way to get in is to start with the Hell, er, Help Desk. It's not the most palatable option, but it's a foot in the door. The best companies know and expect that you won't want to stay there and will help you to grow so you can move on to other departments. It's where I started and it's not all that bad in a good environment. You can see how other departments work, where you want to transfer, and you'll usually get first consideration for a job for being internal.

If you want to go back to college, I recommend starting with a community college. It's inexpensive. The classes are smaller. The atmosphere is more personal. If you decide to move on, you can transfer to a 4-year school and your degree will still say X University, not X Community College. I've seen both a Uni and a CC. I preferred the CC.

Anyway, I'm rambling now, but I'm hoping something here helped.

*hugs*